may 18

when discussing things of a spiritual nature, there is always the question of whether or not to write things down. i figure, not only does it releave my mind from the worry of forgetting, but it also means i can share it on my page. plus, hey, the attendents of rumi did it, so why can't i.

notes from session with kirin, sandy's yoga teacher

[meditation] (be observer of own thoughts)
Ah - first and last sound, 
      sound of opening the mouth
    (it is the condensed version of 
     8000 lines of buddhist text)
it is the dharma of the mind
  to create thoughts
mind is creation
  when observe - though is
    frozen, stops  (this is how i saw it)
[discussion]
wisdom - there are three stages of gaining wisdom
 - from other people saying something
 - from own experience (this is kinda two)
 wisdom has a hollow quality
  + the quality to mirror
 - knowing within - having
   a spacious heart - mirrored
   in the world around you
 - being around a wise person - that
   silence of heart is in the air
   has vastness that includes 
   everyone around
 - this is all innermost part of the outer,
   after that is being
 wisdom is in the moment
   not past or future
   that's why don't need info
"not always so"
wisdom - feels right
   nobility = wisdom?

"my experience is real" but exp. is in time
 experience is always there, 
  one comes + goes from it?


Rama is fighter, dharma
Krisna is perfected form - lover
 (confucius vs. lao-tzu?)

dharma - can't change what
  has been set in motion 
  along natural order
 dharma is confusing

forgiving someone else is really
  accepting own role/responsibility
  (dharma?)


trying to escape mental (social) conditioning...
is religion another kind of conditioning?

i ask her afterwards, how does one live a life of wisdom in a world of information, and she tells me that you must become so vast that you encompass the world of knowledge... it disolves into you. silence is this vast. and you get there by living it in the spaces between dealings with the world of knowledge

i try to call amanda but she's away for a few days... off at the house of another guy named chris. i really want to talk to her... i realize that, in my rush to relax, i forgot that she is part of my tranquil, joy-filled world, not someone stressful that i should fear calling. silly me. i'll be seeing her soon, tho, which will be nice.