18/2/96

I've been able to spend some more time with people, which makes me very happy.
Usually I just flit from group to group, person to person. Staying nowhere long enough to really have a conversation or get to know anyone.
I never want to be stuck, but this is almost too much to the other side.
But recently I have had a chance to have a few conversations here and there. Meeting new people too, but that always happens, meeting new people and actually start getting to know them. Sincere interactions with people.
The other night I was out to coffee with a friend and I realized how important it was to really give someone your attention. She was constantly looking over my head and to the sides, just saying "right" "yeah" "uh-huh". I was getting so frustrated and I felt like such shit. I know I do that to people though, and I don't mean to.
Anyhow, getting to know people is so wonderful. Although many of the people that I consider my closest friends find it very uncomfortable to be close with anyone. It is a bit unsettling, but at the same time requires that you have your independance and are stable on your own. You can't rely on other people to fill any personal gaps.